Phil's Dinner Table Manifesto

1. Honor your guests. 


2. Remain quiet when they speak. 


3. Only tell the truth when asked. 


4. Always ask them to stay for dessert. 


5. Do not gossip about the neighbor. 


6. Tell them why you're home all day. 


7. Ask for money if they can spare any. 


8. Do not frown. 


9. Speak in a solemn voice. 


10. Do not get drunk.